Claws gripping on dreams
Chasing elusive prey
Reality has become my playground
I’m the king of this jungle
Have conquered my fear
Acquired absolute control over thyself
Mastered the art of this hunt
I’m always a step ahead
A check move ahead
My genius an awe mystery
As I finesse my brilliance
Few understand and many admire in awe
I am the Fierce Fire Tiger
A golden hustler of all time…
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New year, new life u breathed in me
The future is unknown but hope makes the heart excited
For all we have is now, so let’s celebrate the present
And let faith and strive guide us in our quest
As success is a journey not a destination
We take it slow and enjoy the experiences
As our rush has proved to be harzardous
Because we build on feeble foundations
By bricks of debt and no savings
Ultimately we own nothing but work for everything
We have become self-made economic slaves
And the simple joys of life we’ve grown to ignore
As bills and monetary growth is all we think of
And forget to just admire the breeze and scenery life has to offer
The simplicity of nature, God…
Let’s live again
Love again and smile again
As life is but a journey
We’re here to discover and explore
The universe and thyself…
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Beneath the flash and physical beauty is a whithering soul
One who once believed but the darkness of life stole
Now fear takes dominance and self-solitude progress
Happiness’s a sojourn, most days have become a stress
Material wealth is first priority and what others think or say
while the spirit we ignore and all it’s needs we keep at bay
For all that seems important now is to serve our human sentence
When the unknown truth is our spiritaul growth in this journey is of our essence
We instead define ourselves of qualities that are the least of importance
We hover the this earth in unruly patterns
For nature we have brought to it’s demise over our selfish motives
We explore, we destroy, in search of unknown purpose
In foreign lands, artificial sources and science glories
We find solice in our material success stories
We’re lost we know it but we make it the least of our worries
As we’re here to take and hover this life like zombies
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It’s amazing how certain life experiences make us realize that we’re growing up. When you get hit by a challenge that you never thought you’ll experience in a million years when you were younger. I have to admit that this has been the most challenging year for me in every sphere of my life; career, love life, family, finance and friendship. Oh, and ofcause the self.
As definitely not my favourite year, actually my worst by far, I actually grew a lot this year. I learnt a lot about myself, my family and my universe. I discovered my weaknesses and my strengths, and how to use what I have for different situations appropriately. I overcame a few of my fears and also let go of a few bad habits I which some I wasn’t even aware of (working on it ;-P ). Let me share with you snippets of my life events in 2009.
Well firstly, this year started off with me losing my job, which I decided to take the risk of freelancing and being my own boss thereafter, which I’m still doing by the way (Yay!). I’ve been my own boss for 8 full months now and I’m still maintaining and growing. I was lucky enough to get a project immediately after my dismissal which served as my stepping stone of my new journey. I’ve been doing most of my work from home which is great but requires a lot of discipline and change of routine every now and then to keep going. From this I’ve learned to do my own invoices, billing statements, credit notes, contracts and other business documentation plus new rules and regulations concerned respectively. I’ve acquired great management skills in most business aspects: financial, administration, project management, time management (which was my biggest weakness) and client services.I can now fish for new clients, prepare a proper business presentation, creat a client portfolio and manage it, organize and plan a project from start to finish. And I’m still learning.
Secondly, I lost a home a week after I lost my job when my dad divorced his wife. So I lived with my cousin for a while (about 6 months) and finally made the brave decision to get my own place. Well I would have made the move much earlier but my income wasn’t stable enough at the time so it didn’t give me much confidence to do so. I decided to wait until my finances stabalized.
Thirdly, my girlfriend who was also my bestfriend (for 4 years) broke up with me over the sudden change in my life hence not having enough time for her nor focus. As much as I’d still go over to visit her as usual, my mind was always pre-occupied with work or problems I had at the time, so our time together turned to just quantity and not quality (my bad for that). So our relationship started detoriating and distance built between us. My confidence started to drop in our relationship (with everything else) and just wasn’t sure anymore if she still wanted to with me or not, I had to make sure where she stood without jumping into conclusions on my own. So one night I called her and firstly apologized for not being the coolest guy to be around lately and then later asked her if she was still okay with me and gave her the option that she doesn’t have to stick around if she feels she can’t handle it anymore. So there were only one of two answers that would determine where she stood, whether she still wanted to be with me or she wanted out but just didn’t have the heart to end it herself. And guess which one she went for… yup u guessed right ;-0 , with no hesitation she said she wants out… The biggest heartbreak of my life yet. Her reason being that she doesn’t want to add to my current stress by being around, so she’s giving me space to sort out my life. And never heard from her ever since. Yeah, I know… I still don’t get it. Anyways, I guess I got stung by a scorpio :-p , what the hack, let’s move on to no 4… Lol! ;-p
About 1 week after the break up, the MD of my first (and only at that stage) freelance project called me for a meeting to let me know that the project will be getting a new design so I’ll be inactive until the new design was complete. Now this was my only source of income at that stage and the design period was indefinate. So I didn’t have any source of income for the next month and had to come up with a plan quick in just a week. So I sent out mail and had to design, print and distribute business cards to try to get my next project. I was called for an interview at a Marketing and PR company and I started working for them on my freelance terms. Phew! Right on time…
Shortly after no 4, weird number 5 happened. I was on my way to a friend’s place and was getting lost since it was my first visit, so I parked on the parallel parking slots while I was on the phone getting directions and ready to do a u-turn when I noticed a white Toyota Conquest at the traffic lights about to turn into my direction. So I thought, okay let me wait for this car to pass first before doing a u-turn plus I was in a parking space so I was not in any obstructing position for traffic. The next thing I heard was a huge BANG! and inverse impact on my car. The damn Conquest drove into me! Now, I had my car for just over a year without any accidents nor dents, and this idiot crashes into me. No, it gets better. When I stepped out of my car furious as hell, asking myself WTF? The idiot tells me he’s sorry but he actually hit me on purpose as he thought I was someone else. Yeah I know, WTF? So he goes on to tell me that there were three guys where he was having drinks that tried to steal his car but rushed off in a black car when caught up with what they were up to and decided to chase them. Now the only thing he took note of was a black hatchback, not the make nor registration number. I then tell him that we have to call the police to the scene. And then he starts begging me not to and tells me he wasn’t supposed to be where he was and his wife will kill him, plus he’s a respectable priest of a church nearby(and this guy was drunk) and showed me his documentation and uniform. OMG!!! Getting crashed into by a drunk priest who was chasing thieves attempting to steal his car at club. What a freak accident! Did I mention that the guy cried? Yup! And stupid me, I felt sorry for the guy and didn’t call the police. I ended up having to chase him for 4 months after the accident for him to pay for the damages. He paid just a portion of the amount and since I was tired of chasing him so much, I just let the outstanding amount go. I’ll add to the money needed for repairs.
Well just recently (mid-september), my mother got extremely ill, close to death. She was diagnosed with Tuberculosis which atleast is cureable though if the proper treatment is taken properly. Well the last two weeks of September were filled with random regular trips to the hospital. Luckily I work from home this year, so I was able to be there for her at all times. About two weeks into her illness, she confessed to my sister and I that she’s not ill from just TB but she was also diagnosed with HIV. Her cd4 count was below 200, which means that she is now in the AIDS phase of the illness. It was quite shocking news but immediately changes my perspective in life in some way. We told her will be there for no matter what and that she shouldn’t fear anything as we’re in this together. I made it my duty to take her to all her hospital appointments and support group sessions. And out my journey with her, I learnt quite a lot more about the virus and syndrome. My mother is doing well now and through this unfortunate event, a greater good came of it as I reconciled with my mother and grew closer than ever with her, as she was absent in my growing years and I always had a black hole in my heart over that but through this incidence I somehow managed to totally forgive and forget, start up fresh and move on with life. This event has been by far my most spiritual and emotionally challenging of all.
I have two more other events that happened thereafter, but this article is getting a bit too long. So I’ll cut it right here.
I had a beautiful festive season and looking forward to 2010, I know it has the best for me instore. Please keep your head up no matter what you go through, every storm passes. take it from me, I KNOW 
Happy New Year!!!
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I recently stumbled upon a video on YouTube of a new upcoming South African reggae artist called Dmphoza, haven’t heard of him before this really, but liked his sound. I wonder if he’s getting radio airplay for any of his songs? Well listen to this track and tell me what you think, this sound is quite fresh and has more of a kwaito feel though.
If you know any more info on this artist, please share. Here’s the video, it’s titles:
Izandla Phakamisa by Dmphoza
→ 2 CommentsTags: Humour and Entertainment · Music, Art and Literature
